haustion

patience leaves when she confirms that all is ending
and good so around the corner
liberation soon
she can't help but craving to jump off
to induce some little immediate change
just to peep the good she thinks maybe she can
she really can't but
left at the space of pitch nothingness
nothing rather than tormented by the present now
but tormented by boredom and nothingness

so impatient
too eager
she knows she could not have to submit to undeserved but does she
does she yet

too eager that it eats her up

Date: 1.5 months before

self justifying

there's this graceful balancing a rope trampler has to learn, even

so this has happened, done deal, what one can do is just to focus on the upcoming

you call it remedy or i know not, just things of the present you have to face

Date: 2 after; 1 before

venomous cheers

even if it's not, at times im in need of even a counterfeit, pseudo, transition
and you are the closest - what am i to do (innocent shrug)

and incredibly it seems even righter than the last legit and authentic - forgery outscoring the once authentic - what am i to do (innocent shrug shrug monkey covering face)

how am i to defend us - feeling tempted and feeble, conscious and cautious.

i so want i so want so want

hint and subtlety
what so ever
i shud stop caring lay my eyes on the brighter ahead
yet i am so occupied, haunted by the greed
it's not greed but something i deserve?
and i owe everything to fate
fated to dress in this disposition
my so positioned

as so arranged
things and people i see and i meet

beat it hard

'when life gives you lemon, make lemonade' hahahahhahaha alrighty
i have this whole hamper of summer berries.

less than three weeks.

has it all

i must have overused it in my first attempt, and i failed my second.
first, u were so blessed to had me at my fullest and innocence. lucky lucky you. and i remain utterly glad that it was you too :)

i think i won't stop missing it so, u better not ruin it for me when we meet, tomorrow. teehee !!

and my second, i must have been still drained and dehydrated that i made some silly wrong decisions and failed to give enough. faulty defect has it all swallowed but, i guess i had an interesting gustatory journey, did you too?

more time to reenergize myself to get myself ready for the next, hopefully the naturalistic and effortless experience, for life. serenity needs be realized.

and fills me up