So that I am less easily distracted
I thought by the environment
Sound, flash, smell
But really myself too
Itch, thirst, thoughts
Why do I think about non-you when am with you in the first place?
Is that (in)capability?
But I don't want to be numb to you
Or of you
Or by you
Rather, I want to fuse with you, to become you, part of you and whole of you
Inseparable, inside, and out
All encompassing
Bodily and spiritually
Fluidly and organically
Is it possible
Why ain't I you
Fate's joke on me, that I ain't you
But fate's mercy on me
That I have you, that I met you
And we love one another
I still doubt at times
But you've made me better at fending that off
For being so far unwavering
I don't know if I don't trust myself or I don't trust you
I tend to think I don't trust humanity
But what else can I trust
But love
