so sane coming clean

spreading it over to loving friends got me thinking -

am i being overdramatic and extreme
caught me laughing
at the stupifying maytyr sacrifice

how is this noble
nibbling

i don't understand where this is coming from, created from unlikely budding, for my experience
only the sole reason

probably not the us but me only
bent and crooked
fear of being dull and plain and bored and ordinary im putting on this hilarious and hideous skit
forcing pushing intensity

something made up to fill my skull
it's savoury and flavory
added to white flour
bitter snacking

undeserved of my intensity but this pleases myself? sick?

wildness going fine and safe
i did the scripting

but self fulfilling prophecy? if i keep talking myself into being ill i'll sleep on sickbed?

sickens calmness and mildness and
wannabe out of the rational

noam

thank you :)

click,

you like my song
- reading my inner and backing me up

you embrace my sadness
- in soothing silence

you put a smile on my face
- with your easy humor

aint no story teller
you are the caring companion

:)

much love.

P!nk - Just Give Me A Reason ft. Nate Ruess

willing victim

head running wild

everything

in a mind

two day and it felt like two years.

how i hope it has been two years so the spasm might have been over. never mind oh never mind my ration is letting it wilt and it knows the monster's wilting does me all good and does us both healthy. some sustainability from killing intrinsic incompatibility- this is how I'm ruling it. court ruling and it's official.

I'm usually as intense and not give a damn about worldly views, silly bars and mandate perspectives, really mandate and good killing sights and mindsets but here I'm, well killed and covered in blood here lying on the ground breathless. lifeless. This me you saw doesn't live any more. like that part of innocence passed away at my age of 19, however hard I tried to retrieve and retain the kid in me all effort futile.

and this is how everyone grows boring. adulthood.

does it feel better to mingle with adults, or does crying on my own help.

mar 25 night. bold. leap

i dnt even know whos telling me i cant do this and that and who sets those fucking boundaries. probably me and my nuts only

why would i care why do i have to care what what am i caring

but these invisible fences

barring and insensibly barring me from free thoughts and freeing myself from caring about nothing

and no one hears and no one cares or i cant tell those i love cause i dnt want them worry and theres nothing to fall back on

and what do i want to fall back on. what do i have to fall on and where am i falling from just

stupid.

am i the one to judge and do i qualify to why are you doing it wrong doing me wrong or are you doing it right or everyone just being egocentric and selfish

do we do what we want only and if so maybe that's how this order came about the society being out of tune and everyone behaves out of tune and super chaotic.

do we even make a song

hum it free and voiceless

us. this weather