madness as a prophecy

talks so much, so incredibly much
expressive, eloquent, theatrical
i thought i didn't like it at first
i thought i like it at last

she's substantial, and seeing she argues
i see a part of me in her
i wonder if she, too, argues for the sake of it
that the countering doesn't mean much

for me i just almost instinctively counter-argues most of the time
before my thought condenses and own opinion forms
i dont know if i believe in what i say
but by suggesting the otherwise i induce deeper digging
spiral it down
i don't expect an instant agreeing with me of the feeble-minded
rather i wanted to be convinced and brought to something new

but it's too much sound
and too much of herself
does too much introspection mean lacking in outward looking?
she said she observed
maybe only things that interest her
but who not!
it could be that she's good if i interest her and she's not if i don't
who's full of themselves now

i envy her
her introspection
the depth of her thoughts
her persuasiveness and the assertiveness

i envy her not
the assertiveness and the persuasiveness
so much self
and the labor of so much thinking too deep
- i thought i was a case near lost, she's more

the velocity of words coming out of her mouth
and the amount, coming without a pause
it hurts my ears my brain and my concentration
a steed
or not

the overthinker

i don't dramatize anything, and i don't overthink - she does (look to the right!)

this little dame-chen residing in my lawless state of oblongata, like zomia
who dials my nerves and sends vertical signals through my body
prickling, ticklish and wiry
it deranges me and sometimes, can you believe
she rides me bumpily to ecstasy

like mermaid, lorelei, devilish elf she is!

should you like to go on this ride of ecstasia,
let our tendrils intertwine with gentle undulations
hark the electrification behold the - kaboom!

we make ripples of lights and circles of lives
hear howling with might and screaming and cries!
crescendos of the murmuring and jive
insisting and wondering why

Credits: http://www.puckermob.com/lifestyle/14-things-only-overthinkers-will-understand

food

this german friend of mine is obsessed over only letting tea leaves stay in the water the instructed amount of time
this english friend of mine, i think, throws away tea bags a bit too early and totally puts too much milk in it
i think the slavic twins friends of mine even wanna measure the temperature of the water before putting the tea in

- think about how we keep reusing the tea in the pot when we go yum-cha in hong kong
well, german said the tea might get bitter if it stayed too long
i said, the bitterness could as well be what it's meant for - or not

but any way i don't understand the idea of fixed recipes

this korean friend of mine asked if i missed home food
i said i cook maybe the asian way with 'western' ingredients
the fact is
i love cheese and yogurt
smoked salmon and rocket salad
what is home food anyway

chinese food is a stupid notion
to me it only refers to chinese take-away you get outside of Asia
greasy and shiny
Gebranntnudeln it could be in the whole of Germany

they are interested in the exotic i guess
and to them mangoes and lychees are fine delights from the east
my bolivian friend has never seen a dragonfruit, a shame that i haven't had time to show her
but i treated ms belarusian
- and durian? probably a very spiky myth

oh and tofu! at least in Germany they have predominantly fried tofu
it's the silk and smooth one that i long

and i've learnt that broccoli and spinach can be eaten raw
and i am developing caffeine dependence
at the same time appreciating the wonder of comforting tea - but with the leaves staying in however they want

what food do i desire?